by Charlotte Stein
by Charlotte Stein
I picked this up after reading this blog post.
I’m not going to say much about the plot because honestly that’s not the important thing here. It’s the dialogue and Alice’s inner monologue. It’s the most fantastically comical surrealistic thing I’ve read in quite some time.
“Can you blame me? Your face is what magic would look like, if it were real. Harry Potter could probably use your jaw to destroy Voldemort.”
“Just ignore my voice. There’s a frightened nun living in my throat.”
“Is it weird if I find that weird?” “I think it’d be weird if you didn’t. I’m some stranger, soaking himself in your bathtub while you’re passed out on the bed. Sounds like the start of a horrible Lifetime movie about a crazed hobo.”
“Well, okay. Maybe not perfectly normal. You know in that movie Shame when he’s wandering around with it dangling away and everyone did a collective gasp? It’s kind of like that. I have a lot of excessive dangle. And you just can’t show excessive dangle in a romantic drama. Arthouse only, for sudden shocking penis.”
“I swear, I only do that if you don’t put the lotion on your skin.” She paused, pretending to consider. “Or is that when you get the hose again?”
(OK, maybe I’m the only creepy geeky one around here?)
Yes, yes, I know. There’s a ton of angst, emotions all over the place, phobias, and suicidal ideation. There’s also a rather real and gripping look through the eyes of a disable heroine, including what seems to me, a realistic depiction of a sexual relationship that actual includes the disability. While that’s all well done, it’s not what did it for me with this story. It was as if a big bag of sex got dumped right on top of an enormous pile of angsty nerddom. I didn’t even have to spare any concentration on willful suspension of disbelief over the completely ridiculous plot device/story line that got them together and kept them together. I just didn’t even care, and that’s unusual for me when it comes to contemporaries. I hate to gush, especially when most everyone else is gushing, (I’m contrary that way) but I really enjoyed this book.
So a solid 4 stars, a new author I’ll be checking out, and a thank you to Dear Author for putting this book out there.